Not everything we start reaches full term, and that includes relationships. Sometimes, what starts out with promise and excitement ends abruptly, leaving us questioning why. A relationship that ends in its early stages can feel devastating—filled with unfulfilled hopes and lingering “what ifs.”
However, if you’ve done your shadow work, you will navigate through the experience with grace and wisdom. You don’t get to bypass being human, you are simply able to turn down the suffering in its intensity and duration. In other words, you don’t feel the pain as hard and you don’t feel it as long.
It’s important to listen to the body’s wisdom and the heart’s intuition because there is always a correlation between the two.
When explaining loss of physical vitality, medical professionals often point to reasons like autoimmune disorders, trauma, and toxins. As stated in the book, The Body Keeps Score by Basel Van Der Kolk, these same forces—mirrored in the emotional realm—can also be the unseen culprits behind a short-lived relationship.
Fighting What’s Meant To Be Nourishing
In the body, an autoimmune response mistakenly attacks the body, treating parts of its own self as a threat instead of as a part of what keeps it alive and vibrant. In relationships, unhealed wounds or deep-seated fears can trigger self-sabotage, pushing away the very love we say we desire. When past heartbreaks or trust issues make us defensive, we unknowingly reject the possibility of something good before it has a chance to grow.
A Body That Remembers, A Heart That Protects
Emotional trauma reshapes how we engage in relationships. It can snuff out the possibility of life for a relationship. If we’ve been hurt before, the nervous system may react to love with fear, causing us to flee or shut down before intimacy can take root. Sometimes, the past haunts us so deeply that we end something prematurely—not because it isn’t working, but because we fear reliving old pain.
Silent Poisons – A Relationship’s Slow Demise
There are toxic dynamics that can poison a new relationship. Whether it’s emotional unavailability, self-deception, or unresolved baggage, certain relationships are doomed not because of a lack of love, but because the conditions for growth are inhospitable. When something isn’t healthy, the body—or the soul—knows it must let go.
Healing After the Loss
No matter how small the hurt, there must be a healing process. It may seem like a loss, but it’s actually a gain. Let me explain.
A failed relationship, like a failed endeavor, leaves an emptiness that can be difficult to bear. But healing comes when we trust that what ended was never meant to continue—that our body, our heart, and even the universe itself were protecting us from something that was not aligned with our highest good.
Some of the things that you can allow to happen on your healing journey are the following:
– Grieve, but do not regret. Pain is a sign that your love was real, but so is your resilience.
– Honor the lessons. Every loss carries wisdom that prepares us for what’s truly meant for us.
– Trust in divine timing. Just as some projects go to their end, so do some relationships. The right one will have the strength, and the shared mission, to last.
– You still have a life that matters, so live it! Do the things you love and be with the people who matter to you and who you matter to as well.
Endings are not absolute failures—they are redirections. And when love is meant to stay, it will never have to fight against the body or the soul of either person to have a right to live on.
May you receive the best in all circumstances,
AKA “Reiki Master Shanti,” Reiki Master, Meditation & Wellness
No responses yet